Anyway, lately my mom has been inadvertently making me feel like worthless crap. I don't remember exactly when I started gaining weight but I'm 211 now. Ideal for my height is 150. I'm clinically overweight by all definitions. It shows terribly in my stomach, thighs, and arms(shoulder to elbow, not elbow to wrist). My cute clothes barely fit(if at all), some clothes fit comfortably, and I've recently acquired some stuff that is big enough to smuggle a Mexican family under. I've started to wonder if my size is why my new beau doesn't want a romantic relationship with me, though he has no problem fooling around and whatnot. GAH! Should I give Steve a chance then? He says he loves me but I've never let myself consider him as a viable mate since he's not LDS and his lifestyle is soo not church-friendly. He's busy, though... always wrapped up in helping someone move or tending to a distraught friend and he works full-time.
Back to my weight problem. I can't stop eating. My addiction(or whatever the hell is wrong with me) seems to be getting worse. I feel accomplished if I can make a pound of Red Vines last two days. I feel good about eating Pay Days because "peanuts are healthy, and there's no chocolate". I took pictures of my head/face last night because I had done my makeup for a night out and it was then that I noticed that I have more fat in my face than before. I still haven't gotten the courage to post them online. Well I suppose this is as good a place as any to start...
I forgot how good it feels to blog, even if no one is reading I love to write.
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